Chris Brogan tweeted a great quote that hit me, “Want to improve in 2010? Stop comparing and criticizing and focus on the change YOU can affect.” I’m a competitive person. Part of it comes with playing sports for all of my childhood — it was my “thing.” Part of it comes with being born deaf and eager to prove I’m just as good as everyone else, if not better.
This attitude may be responsible for why I felt passionless for the past few weeks as I tried to explore new ideas and plan for 2010. I saw what many talented writers have planned for 2010, and beat myself up (mentally, of course) for not coming through with some new to do this year. In all honesty, I have a successful business and make a nice full-time living doing what I enjoy.
I talked to my husband about this. He said that it’s OK to keep doing what I’m doing because it works; especially in my case where I don’t have a niche, and I like it that way.
Besides, you don’t know what path someone else took she get where she is today. You can’t copy someone else. Why? No one can be you the best way possible — only you can. There will never be another Oprah even after her show ends. That’s because she’s Oprah. Look at Ellen DeGeneres. She has a successful talk show, but it’s not compared to Oprah because Ellen is being herself rather than trying to imitate Oprah.
My problem is coming up with something remarkable. No one stands in my way, a problem for some folks as Seth Godin explains. I’ve read some of his books that talk about people who did something remarkable. I just haven’t found my way… yet.
All I can do is share what I learn and hope that it helps you in some small way. That I will keep on doing.
However, I do want to target working fewer hours for the same amount of earnings, if not more. Though I love what I do, I’d like more time to do other things such as volunteer work.
What can you change? What will you change?
Meryl,
Your husband is correct, take the pressure off yourself. You may have already done something remarkable in the eyes of others. We are so hard on ourselves and I am saying this as much to myself. I recently wrote a post, Don’t Care So Much About What Others Think http://is.gd/5MNwd because I noticed a behaviour in myself that wasn’t helpful and from the comment I realized that I wasn’t alone. We are all unique being.
Writing this post in and of itself makes you remarkable because you are sharing a piece of you and it makes you real.
Avil Beckford
.-= Avil Beckford’s blog …The Invisible Mentor Interviews Steve Spalding Part Two =-.
Sometimes, Meryl, we are like fish swimming in the water asking ‘what water?’… in this case, you might enjoy knowing I find you VERY unique. I’ve said it privately and I’ll say it here… yours is some of the very best material I get in my inbox, and I get a lot. So… Keeping on doing what you are doing really works for me! I’m grateful for it! Robin
Meryl,
I think your chosen path thus far is remarkable. Good on you for making the decision to try and pull back a bit to do some other things. That’s important stuff.
I’m not sure how or what changes I’ll be making, I guess I’ll know when the time comes.
George
.-= George Angus’s blog …Setting Up Your Agents and Editors Page =-.
I like this short, sweet post. Puts things into perspective. I am taking the same route for the first part of this year … sticking to my niche, not do anything too fancy, and trying NOT to compare myself to others out there making a successful go of it too.
.-= Pamela Wilson’s blog …New year = new inspiration =-.
Meryl, I’d love to know, if you could do anything you wanted to do all day without having to worry about money or anything else at all, how would you spend your day? No need to answer publicly. I thought entertaining the idea might be helpful…
.-= Christina Katz’s blog …Welcome, Novelist Therese Walsh, Here To Answer Your Questions =-.
Girl, do you know how much I admire you for all that you’ve accomplished and the great writing you do? 🙂
Christina nailed it though– if you can answer that question, then you’ve got a path that lies ahead in that direction.
Besides, I still have to catch up with you– haven’t attempted skydiving yet.
.-= Karen Putz’s blog …Deaf Mom’s Good Stuff of 2009 =-.
@Avil, you’re right that most of us are harder on ourselves than anyone else. I’m guilty, but I’m also honest with myself. Thanks for linking to your post. I missed it! I still struggle because I care about doing the very best for my clients, and that means caring what they think about me (OK, my work).
@Robin, thank you for that. You live up to your motto, Robin!
@George, I appreciate you. I’ll be here to listen to whenever and whatever you decide. I’m sure you’ll do the best thing for you.
@Pam, you’re on target and I encourage folks to check out Pam’s New year = new inspiration post.
@Christina, as always, you know how to ask the right questions. I don’t have an answer to that… yet.
@Karen, you’re a great writer, too. Your articles almost always make me laugh (unless it’s a serious topic like Diego’s birth).